BE A MOTHER IN LAW NOT A MONSTER IN LAW
Qualities of a good mother in law
1 GROW AND LIVE WITH VALUES
Start living with values so that you yourself can feel happy about you.Dont advice anybody live and let them learn themselves from your way of life.This helps your daughterin law to feel happy and be prestigeous to be your daughter in law.
Basic values to be followed
1 Be truthful to yourself and others.
2 Dont be a miser.
3 Dont depend on others physically and financially unnecessarily.
4 Dont be greedy.
5 Dont discuss other's family matters in your house unnecessarily.
6 Dont gather and pass comment on other's family happenings either good or bad.
7 Develop the habit of book reading at least some religious books like holy gita.
8 Develop some knowledge regarding nutrition and dietitics and herbals.
9 Avoid the news gatherers in your relatives or friends.
10 Dont criticise anybody.
11 Develop the habit of sitting alone (if u didnt harm anybody through your words or actions,u can sit peacefully or else you will feel empty)
12 Dont leak out your family details such as difference of opinion with daughter in law to others.
13 Dont talk in a sercastic way.
14 Ask sorry from heart to others if felt that you have committed a mistake.
15 Dont follow strict way in making food which you prefer or else allow her to cook freely.
16 Try to avoid too many guest visits.
17 Treat the maid servants well.
18 Avoid going out with son and daughter in law ,as she may not like all the time.
19 Dont compare your daughter in law with anybody.
20 Dont borrow and wear the jewels of your daughter in law.
21 Dont demand either money or household work or anything from your daughter in law.
22 Understand and respect her likes and dislikes and feelings of your daughter in law.
23 Dont dump all the kitchen works as she enters the house itself.
24 Dont try to change her character,food habits,criticise her beliefs through domination.
25 Always keep in mind that one can change only oneself not others.
26 Appreciate her positives wholeheartedly in an adult state of mind.
27 Dont have a family talk avoiding your daughter in law as it may question her position in your family.
28 Dont bring your relatives to advice your daughter in law.
29 Dont complain your daughter in law to her parents unnecessarily.
30 Change the attitude from a cat and the mouse relationship with your daughter in law.
31 Dont interefere in the personal matters or in conflicts between the husband and wife.
32 Dont interfere in husband and wife's perception of child.
33 Build a good friendly atmosphere from the beginning, through your love and care for her.
34 Dont allow her to wash your plate or clothes unless you are bed ridden or feeling sick as this create a high feeling for you in her heart.
35 Watch out if she eats in time instead of demanding your breakfast as this care enables a motherly touch.
36 Dont build a master slave relationship instead of a mother daughter relationship.
37 Dont pass your bitter experience from your mother in law to your daughter in law.
38 Understand the nature of your daughter in law and accept her instead of adjustment.
39 Dont use hard words as 'in your house you live as per your wish but here you must change" builds a wall in your family.
40 Arrange a lovely atmosphere to grow her desires and creativity to develop.
41 Dont be a liar or a stealer.
42 Dont dump your responsibility completely on her if a need arise,ask whether she is willing or not
43 Dont curse anybody .
44 Dont compell her or demand directly or through your son as this leads to frustration.
45 Dont show through your words,actions and gesture that "my son obeys me so you too".
46 Dont go for a tug of war with your daughter in law in claiming the rights on your son and ignoring the duties.
47 If a conflict arise,forgive her mentally or say sorry in your mind and keep a distance so as to avoid a worst situation instead of talking and advising her.
48 Dont compete with her regarding the right on your son.
49 Think on if you are in her position and come to a conclusion so as to avoid selfish thought.
50 Understand people are different,each one has their own right to live without suppressing your feelings and thoughts upon others.in simple 'live and let live" and develop ''empathy''.
Todays daughter in laws,the future motherinlaws -Think of it.
THE MAIN REASON FOR THIS PROBLEM IS THE LACK OF BRAHMAVIDHYA.THOSE DAYS PEOPLE HAD THIS KNOWLEDGE SO THEY KNOW THE ART OF SELF ENTERTAINMENT BUT NOW PEOPLE TURNED GREEDY AND TOO EXTROVERT AND THEY DONT KNOW THE REAL ENJOYMENT INSTEAD OF DISTURBING THE COUPLES.BOTH THE MOTHERIN LAW AND DAUGHTER IN LAW HAD COMMON GOAL IN THOSE DAYS TO ATTAIN BRAHMAM.BUT NOW THE TACTICAL ONE WILL RULE THE OTHER EITHER DAUGHTER IN LAW OR THE MOTHER IN LAW.
A person's mother-in-law is the mother of his or her spouse. A person is a son-in-law or daughter-in-law to the mother-in-law. She and the father-in-law are the parents of the spouse and of those sisters-in-law and brothers-in-law (if any) who are siblings of the spouse (as opposed to spouses of siblings). Together the members of this family affinity group are called the in-laws. Two women who are mothers-in-law to each other's children may be called co-mothers-in-law, or, if there are grandchildren.
A plant has to be planted very carefully without removing the soil.Similarly a girl brought up with great care and love when enters her husband house it is like the process of budding.A plant grows from a seed naturally,but budding is an artificial process.Her environment,way of living will be different so she needs a time to adapt herself to the new family.She may have homesick and she needs a loving and supporting surrounding initially so that she may slowly adapts and start thinking the new people as her own family members.But in some houses motherinlaw establish her dominance once the daughterinlaw step into the house itself, a master -slave relationship will be developed .Better give love instead of demanding it,a big tree doesnt need to be watered daily where as a sibling needs water.
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| KUNTI,THE BEST MOTHER IN LAW |
Qualities of a good mother in law
1 GROW AND LIVE WITH VALUES
Start living with values so that you yourself can feel happy about you.Dont advice anybody live and let them learn themselves from your way of life.This helps your daughterin law to feel happy and be prestigeous to be your daughter in law.
Basic values to be followed
1 Be truthful to yourself and others.
2 Dont be a miser.
3 Dont depend on others physically and financially unnecessarily.
4 Dont be greedy.
5 Dont discuss other's family matters in your house unnecessarily.
6 Dont gather and pass comment on other's family happenings either good or bad.
7 Develop the habit of book reading at least some religious books like holy gita.
8 Develop some knowledge regarding nutrition and dietitics and herbals.
9 Avoid the news gatherers in your relatives or friends.
10 Dont criticise anybody.
11 Develop the habit of sitting alone (if u didnt harm anybody through your words or actions,u can sit peacefully or else you will feel empty)
12 Dont leak out your family details such as difference of opinion with daughter in law to others.
13 Dont talk in a sercastic way.
14 Ask sorry from heart to others if felt that you have committed a mistake.
15 Dont follow strict way in making food which you prefer or else allow her to cook freely.
16 Try to avoid too many guest visits.
17 Treat the maid servants well.
18 Avoid going out with son and daughter in law ,as she may not like all the time.
19 Dont compare your daughter in law with anybody.
20 Dont borrow and wear the jewels of your daughter in law.
21 Dont demand either money or household work or anything from your daughter in law.
22 Understand and respect her likes and dislikes and feelings of your daughter in law.
23 Dont dump all the kitchen works as she enters the house itself.
24 Dont try to change her character,food habits,criticise her beliefs through domination.
25 Always keep in mind that one can change only oneself not others.
26 Appreciate her positives wholeheartedly in an adult state of mind.
27 Dont have a family talk avoiding your daughter in law as it may question her position in your family.
28 Dont bring your relatives to advice your daughter in law.
29 Dont complain your daughter in law to her parents unnecessarily.
30 Change the attitude from a cat and the mouse relationship with your daughter in law.
31 Dont interefere in the personal matters or in conflicts between the husband and wife.
32 Dont interfere in husband and wife's perception of child.
33 Build a good friendly atmosphere from the beginning, through your love and care for her.
34 Dont allow her to wash your plate or clothes unless you are bed ridden or feeling sick as this create a high feeling for you in her heart.
35 Watch out if she eats in time instead of demanding your breakfast as this care enables a motherly touch.
36 Dont build a master slave relationship instead of a mother daughter relationship.
37 Dont pass your bitter experience from your mother in law to your daughter in law.
38 Understand the nature of your daughter in law and accept her instead of adjustment.
39 Dont use hard words as 'in your house you live as per your wish but here you must change" builds a wall in your family.
40 Arrange a lovely atmosphere to grow her desires and creativity to develop.
41 Dont be a liar or a stealer.
42 Dont dump your responsibility completely on her if a need arise,ask whether she is willing or not
43 Dont curse anybody .
44 Dont compell her or demand directly or through your son as this leads to frustration.
45 Dont show through your words,actions and gesture that "my son obeys me so you too".
46 Dont go for a tug of war with your daughter in law in claiming the rights on your son and ignoring the duties.
47 If a conflict arise,forgive her mentally or say sorry in your mind and keep a distance so as to avoid a worst situation instead of talking and advising her.
48 Dont compete with her regarding the right on your son.
49 Think on if you are in her position and come to a conclusion so as to avoid selfish thought.
50 Understand people are different,each one has their own right to live without suppressing your feelings and thoughts upon others.in simple 'live and let live" and develop ''empathy''.
Todays daughter in laws,the future motherinlaws -Think of it.
THE MAIN REASON FOR THIS PROBLEM IS THE LACK OF BRAHMAVIDHYA.THOSE DAYS PEOPLE HAD THIS KNOWLEDGE SO THEY KNOW THE ART OF SELF ENTERTAINMENT BUT NOW PEOPLE TURNED GREEDY AND TOO EXTROVERT AND THEY DONT KNOW THE REAL ENJOYMENT INSTEAD OF DISTURBING THE COUPLES.BOTH THE MOTHERIN LAW AND DAUGHTER IN LAW HAD COMMON GOAL IN THOSE DAYS TO ATTAIN BRAHMAM.BUT NOW THE TACTICAL ONE WILL RULE THE OTHER EITHER DAUGHTER IN LAW OR THE MOTHER IN LAW.
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